How can I reach happiness, or how is happiness achieved? How often do I find myself thinking that there are things out there that will make me happy? How often does a person or an activity make me happy? How did that one happy moment that I can never forget become such a special memory?
Just like in the previous section, I’m approaching today’s questions not by seeing happiness as a goal, but by asking how we can increase contentment.
In my opinion, the best way to increase contentment is by making peace with ourselves—by letting go of our insecurities, not taking everything personally, and accepting life as it is. The best way to achieve this is to distance ourselves from distractions as much as possible and create time where we can be alone with ourselves.
To expand on what it means to distance ourselves from distractions: this could mean spending more time with your partner, family, or loved ones. It could mean holding on tighter to what you already have, and embracing the activities that make you feel good. Similarly, reassessing your goals, setting realistic ones, and focusing on them will also protect you from distractions. Because when you do things that align with who you are and make you feel good, you’ll stop searching for happiness elsewhere—just like when you’re with people who make you feel good, you won’t constantly seek out other circles.
That way, instead of comparing yourself and wondering, “Why am I not like that?”, you’ll begin to accept yourself as you are. Rather than trying to become someone you admire from the outside, you’ll become someone who expresses themselves from within. You’ll realize that every person is special in their own way, and how far you may have drifted from your true self because of external influences.
Think of a memory that never leaves your mind and still makes you happy when you recall it. What made that moment special?
What makes this question special is that it gives you the best clues about happiness and life satisfaction.
The reasons that made that moment beautiful might include strong emotional content, personal importance, a shared experience, or the uniqueness of that moment.
For example, a beautiful moment shared with someone you love, a moment that emotionally nourished you (maybe just a hug), a near-death experience that taught you a lot about life, a moment where you reached a goal you had set, a special day, an event that connected you with others, or a completely unexpected day… The examples can go on.
Don’t just think of this question in terms of all the years you’ve lived up to that moment—consider what made you happy that day, what made you feel good that week, or what was beautiful about that month. You’ll realize that being happy isn’t actually that difficult, and that dissatisfaction is often a problem we create for ourselves.
Note: How to Know Yourself is a series of articles that I started years ago in another platform. Now, I am migrating and editing them. You can reach the whole series here: How to know yourself – bahadirhancicek
During migrating directly, I have noticed that order is shifted. The first article is this: How to know yourself, let’s start to journey – bahadirhancicek
From this post, I will continue with my original order. Sorry for the previous ones, if there is any annoying content flow.
bahadirhancicek 
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