As mentioned in the previous article, everyone has their own criteria for happiness and their own approaches to achieving it. How do you approach happiness? Do you think it’s a feeling that comes from within you, or is it entirely dependent on external factors?
Think about the factors present when you are happiest.
And what about the times when you are least happy?
Why do you think you become unhappy when you are? Is it related to the events or situations you are experiencing at that moment, or is it more about your approach to those events?
Can you distinguish between happiness that comes from external sources (events, people, etc.) and the happiness that arises from within, from your own existence?
In the therapeutic stage of various psychological problems such as depression, stress, and social anxiety, a technique called the “safe place exercise” is often used. The safe place exercise is a visualization-based exercise aiming to create a space in the individual’s imagination where they can always retreat to, feel safe, and experience happiness. This allows the person to calm themselves by imagining this place during moments of turmoil, increased anxiety, unhappiness, or when things seem to be getting out of control. It helps replace negative emotions with warmer, more positive feelings. Additionally, it enables the person to approach their emotional state more objectively and rationally at that moment.
The purpose of contemplating factors related to happiness is similar: to identify what makes us happy or unhappy and to understand the background of happiness. So, what happens when you understand the background of happiness?
The answer to this question is highly personal. From my perspective, whenever I felt unhappy, I could at least step out of that mood for the moment and accept it as it is. In moments of happiness, I learned to perceive it not just as an instantaneous emotion but as a feeling that could motivate me for days.
Looking at the source of happiness, some scientists believe it is entirely external, connected to the environment, while others argue that our emotions, beliefs, and thoughts are crucial, explaining happiness through the interaction of our external and internal worlds. Some suggest that happiness is a genetic inheritance, and eventually, we will reach our own unique point of happiness. So, perhaps there is no inherently happy person, and attempting to be happy might lead to deeper unhappiness.
Regardless of the reason, analyzing happiness and unhappiness helps us set boundaries and avoid falling into deep sorrows, anxieties, and thoughts. Even if we fall, it helps us find a way out.
Is happiness an internal or external joy?
In my view, the answer to this question is as follows. Can I control the factors of happiness, or are they beyond my control? If it’s something I can control, I can live that moment to the fullest. If I can’t control it, rather than focusing on the negatives of that moment, I can accept the situation and still live it to the fullest. Uncontrollable happiness has no harm anyway.
Perhaps happiness and unhappiness are merely the result of the limits we create in our minds.
bahadirhancicek 
Leave a comment